And then you have to find a dear friend (you'll know who you are) with whom you can whisper secrets in the arts section of Schuler's and when you do, you'll find that you're telling some of the same secrets, only with different words and things will become that much safer because of it. You'll tell a little ugliness, see that she can handle it, then ask if she thinks your jeans make you look fat because you've been wondering all day and haven't gotten an honest answer out of the baby and someone needs to tell you straight up, for crying out loud and life will continue and you'll still be breathing. Easier even. Cause that's how God works: ugly, then some levity, ugly, then some levity. You've gotta love God. Seriously.
So this is me being real. And cleaning out the rooms. And still wondering why Schuler's can't start selling Aquafina. Then everything would be perfect.